My Nana has a cat, he can be a little devil at times, this is his story:
Hey! Im an artist too! If your feline owner is looking for artistic inspiration, please bring them to the computer and let them read this!
My name is Tommy. My pets say I have the devil in me, but I think I am just an artistic soul, waiting in the shadows to be the next Van Gogh. I will try not to bite off any ears in the mean time.
This is a tutorial on how to artistically shred your pets toilet paper. If at some point you are lost, please go back to step 1. and make sure you are on track.
Step 1. Find the toilet paper! Your pet may have it stored in the closet or under the sink.
Its always best if its under the sink, that way you can play a really annoying game while you’re at it by trying to open the doors.
We all know it may take a few tries to get under there, and my pet just loves hearing the “bang” “bang” of the sink doors.
They love it SO much that they come running to watch me!
You’re in!
Grab the roll!!
RUN!
It is always best, and I learned from a dedicated master to always hide under the bed.
Get that glaring look in your eyes and bite into the toilet paper, letting them know just how dedicated you are to your art!
See figure 1.
Figure 1.
Step 2.
It is always best to hold the toilet paper with all four paws, and remember to:
Kick, Bite, Fling!
Kick, Bite, Fling!
Kick, Bite, Fling!
As illustrated in the photo below,
Step 3.
The toilet paper at this point is everywhere, so you must munch on it a bit to make it really sticky. This allows for any artistic formations to occur. At this point, you can mould it into any form you like. Please reference figure 2.
Figure 2.
Step 4.
Love the toilet paper. You have now created the most beautiful, artistic masterpiece you will ever create. It probably deserves to be in a gallery, in New York!
Make sure not to move it!
Your pets actually LOVE having it under their bed. However, if you don’t see it there the next day it probably means that they had someone come in and carefully move it all to a gallery. Congratulations! You’re famous!
All the best in your artistic endeavours!
Tommy
Leehane 